Post by Brewers GM (Clint) on May 5, 2014 16:44:30 GMT -6
Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this POWER RANKING are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of anyone else in this league. Comparisons made to slutty celebrities or farm animals are made for entertainment purposes only.
I just saw this on Twitter:
@mikedoyle/Mets: 1 Brian McCann C NYY $12,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
2 Joe Mauer C MIN $23,000.000 1/1 2014 3/3
3 Mike Napoli 1B BOS $5,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
4 Daniel Murphy 2B NYM $2,925,000 4/4 2014,2015, 2016, 2017 3/3
5 David Wright 3B NYM $11,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
6 Carlos Beltran OF NYY $13,000,000 1/1 2014 3/3
7 Curtis Granderson OF NYM $13,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
8 Charlie Blackmon OF Col $501,000 4/4 2014,2015,2016,2017 3/3
9 Justin Morneau 1B Col $5,000,000 3/3 2014,2015,2016 3/3
10 Corey Hart OF Sea $10,000,000 1/1 2014 3/3
11 Tim Hudson SP SF $11,000,000 1/1 2014 3/3
12 Grant Balfour RP $4,500,000 3/3 2014,2015,2016 3/3
13 Troy Tulowitski SS COL $10,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
14 Miguel Gonzalez SP $502,000 1/1 2014 3/3
15 Kyle Farnsworth RP NYM $1,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
16 Tommy Hunter RP BAL $1,820,000 1/1 2014 3/3
17 David Robertson RP NYY $3,100,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
18 Travis Wood SP Chi Cubs $527,500 1/1 2014 3/3
19 Matt Harrison SP TEX $5,200,000 2/2 2014/2015 3/3
20 Dillon Gee SP NYM $527,375 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
21 Corey Kluber SP MIN $491,800 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
22 John Lackey SP BOS $15,250,000 1/1 2014 3/3
23 Steve Delabar RP TOR $498,900 4/4 2014,2015,2016,2017 3/3
24 LaTroy Hawkins RP COL $1,000,000 1/1 2014 3/3
25 Aaron Harang SP ATL $1,000,000 1/1 2014 3/3
DL Ivan Nova SP NYY $575,600 3/3 2014,2015,2016 3/3
( $12,400,000 from Reds) )
{ $3,500,000 for Cory Hart}
{ $23,000,000 for Joe Mauer}
{ $10,000,000 for Jose Reyes}
{ $5,000,000 from Twins}
{ $500,000 from Dodgers}
I pay $498,750 for Matt Harvey
Penalty $2,125,000 Chris Young drop
Cap balance $16,421,575 68/75 years
MiLB
Jeremy Hellickson SP TB $503,000 4/4 2014,2015,2016,2017 2/3
Jedd Gyorko 2B SD $490,000 4/4 2014,2015,2016,2017 2/3
J.J. Hoover RP CIN $492,500 4/4 2014 2/3
Marlon Byrd OF PHI $700,000 1/1 2014 2/3
Chad Qualls RP HOU $2,750,000 1/1 2014 2/3
Kelly Johnson UTIL, NYY $3,000,000 1/1 2014 ⅔
Mr. Doyle is a man of his word. I think if he tweets it one more time he will go flying up the rankings!
#9 Florida Marlins, 2-2-1 The Marlins are coming off a victory where they got some payback on the White Sox. After 5 weeks the team record is the definition of mediocre so the #9 ranking seems perfect.
For now this team can just lear at the playoff bound teams ahead of them like the lonely drunk dude at the strip joint. Keep you dollars in your pocket sir. You will be happier in the morning.
MVP: Yasiel Puig 1 HR, 7 RBI, .444, 1.124 OPS
LVP: Aramis Ramirez .063, .500 OPS
Reason For Hope: Sometimes the stripper goes home with someone.
#10 Washington Nationals 2-2-1 The Nats are one of the teams on the outside looking in that has a good job of earning an invitation to the big party. The team got a big win V the Braves based on a stellar offensive week and the fact that your opponent pitched like hot garbage.
MVP: Buster Posey 2 HR, 16 TB, .409, 1.207 OPS
LVP: Ian Desmond .190, .499 OPS
Reason For Hope: I think the Nationals owner also knows how to use twitter. If he does things could get very interesting in that division.
#11 Seattle Mariners, 2-3 Uber Ass Bag Kanye West has compared himself.to among others Beethoven, Steve Jobs, Picasso and Jesus. That is similarly offensive to when Daniel screamed that he was under ranked at 5 just a few weeks ago.
What’s next sir? You going to go pick a fight with Taylor Swift as well. Be care young man………..You might not be able to take another loss like that after getting pounded by a rebuilding Brewers and the front running Dodgers wiping his feet all over your ass.
Free Tip: Your strategy of trading assets for 400 year old pitchers just has to work. Don Drysdale and Teddy Higuera are rumored to be OTB. Go for it my man!
MVP: Mike Zunino 1 HR, .400, 1.071 OPS
LVP: Robbie Ross 16.20 Era, 3.60 Whip
Reason For Hope: The AARP has taken notice of your support of old people and are seriously considering investing in your organization.
#12 Detroit Tigers, 2-3 Do not look now but the Tigers are on a two game heater!
Despite being heckled for being a woman the Tigers owner held strong and treated the Cardinals like a bitch. I had predicted better things for this club. Couple this with my obvious inflection that Kanye is a douche and that kind of proves that I am right once in a while.
It is important to note that the victory over the Cards is not as simple as them not showing up. The Tigers dominated all over the board.
MVP: The Pitching Staff. 7 Players picked up wins.
LVP: No one was monumentally bad…….Big Papi .200, .686 OPS
Reason For Hope: The Tigers can jump right into the race for the division title with a week 6 win V the Reds.
#13 Pittsburgh Pirates, 1-3-1 The Pirates beat a strong TB Rays squad to keep themselves out of the discussion for the Cellar. The dueling Adams Saga is now knotted up at 1-1.
I really think heading into their next matchup these two need to go at it a bit on facebook. Adam on Adam crime could only be terribly entertaining. (albeit confusing for sure)
MVP: Desmond Jennings 3 HR, 2 SB, .348, 1.226 OPS
LVP: Travis d’Arnaud .133, .521
Reason For Hope: This Adam is now tied for league's best Adam (based on head to head)
#14 Arizona Diamondbacks, 1-4. I am not against kicking a guy when he is down so this is not about that. I do however want to take a moment and acknowledge that Mr. Stanco is recovering from a stroke and with that wish everyone in the league has an excellent thought or two about him and his recovery. We will be here when you are ready to actively join this debauchery of a league again sir. (That is unless i get fired)
MVP: Paul Goldschmidt 2HR, 19TB, .440, 1.241 OPS
LVP: James Shields 9.95 Era, 2.05 Whip
#15 Chicago Cubs, 1-4. The Cubs should adopt a team motto of “Thank Goodness For The Twins.” I may have mentioned this earlier but it certainly bears repeating. The Cubs might be the team playing this thing better than anyone. The league is designed to be just like real MLB and sometimes if you look at the Cubs and squint just a little this team looks just like the real life Cubs.
MVP: Jon Lestor 8 IP, 15K, 0.00 ERA, 1W, 1QS, .38 Whip
LVP: Cole HAmels 11.57 Era, 2.79 Whip
Reason For Hope: The New 24 is back. TV Can be Fun!
#16 Minnesota Twins: 0-4-1 What can we say about the Twins. Let’s give him credit for showing up every week. Sooner or later a beaten donkey always gives up.
I do not see that happening with this particular donkey.
MVP: Brian Dozier 1HR, 5SB, .360, .928 OPS
LVP: Andrelton Simmons .125, .472 OPS
Reason For Hope: They do Play the CUBS………...we should all be getting the popcorn ready for that mockumentary!
I just saw this on Twitter:
@mikedoyle/Mets: 1 Brian McCann C NYY $12,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
2 Joe Mauer C MIN $23,000.000 1/1 2014 3/3
3 Mike Napoli 1B BOS $5,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
4 Daniel Murphy 2B NYM $2,925,000 4/4 2014,2015, 2016, 2017 3/3
5 David Wright 3B NYM $11,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
6 Carlos Beltran OF NYY $13,000,000 1/1 2014 3/3
7 Curtis Granderson OF NYM $13,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
8 Charlie Blackmon OF Col $501,000 4/4 2014,2015,2016,2017 3/3
9 Justin Morneau 1B Col $5,000,000 3/3 2014,2015,2016 3/3
10 Corey Hart OF Sea $10,000,000 1/1 2014 3/3
11 Tim Hudson SP SF $11,000,000 1/1 2014 3/3
12 Grant Balfour RP $4,500,000 3/3 2014,2015,2016 3/3
13 Troy Tulowitski SS COL $10,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
14 Miguel Gonzalez SP $502,000 1/1 2014 3/3
15 Kyle Farnsworth RP NYM $1,000,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
16 Tommy Hunter RP BAL $1,820,000 1/1 2014 3/3
17 David Robertson RP NYY $3,100,000 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
18 Travis Wood SP Chi Cubs $527,500 1/1 2014 3/3
19 Matt Harrison SP TEX $5,200,000 2/2 2014/2015 3/3
20 Dillon Gee SP NYM $527,375 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
21 Corey Kluber SP MIN $491,800 2/2 2014,2015 3/3
22 John Lackey SP BOS $15,250,000 1/1 2014 3/3
23 Steve Delabar RP TOR $498,900 4/4 2014,2015,2016,2017 3/3
24 LaTroy Hawkins RP COL $1,000,000 1/1 2014 3/3
25 Aaron Harang SP ATL $1,000,000 1/1 2014 3/3
DL Ivan Nova SP NYY $575,600 3/3 2014,2015,2016 3/3
( $12,400,000 from Reds) )
{ $3,500,000 for Cory Hart}
{ $23,000,000 for Joe Mauer}
{ $10,000,000 for Jose Reyes}
{ $5,000,000 from Twins}
{ $500,000 from Dodgers}
I pay $498,750 for Matt Harvey
Penalty $2,125,000 Chris Young drop
Cap balance $16,421,575 68/75 years
MiLB
Jeremy Hellickson SP TB $503,000 4/4 2014,2015,2016,2017 2/3
Jedd Gyorko 2B SD $490,000 4/4 2014,2015,2016,2017 2/3
J.J. Hoover RP CIN $492,500 4/4 2014 2/3
Marlon Byrd OF PHI $700,000 1/1 2014 2/3
Chad Qualls RP HOU $2,750,000 1/1 2014 2/3
Kelly Johnson UTIL, NYY $3,000,000 1/1 2014 ⅔
Mr. Doyle is a man of his word. I think if he tweets it one more time he will go flying up the rankings!
#9 Florida Marlins, 2-2-1 The Marlins are coming off a victory where they got some payback on the White Sox. After 5 weeks the team record is the definition of mediocre so the #9 ranking seems perfect.
For now this team can just lear at the playoff bound teams ahead of them like the lonely drunk dude at the strip joint. Keep you dollars in your pocket sir. You will be happier in the morning.
MVP: Yasiel Puig 1 HR, 7 RBI, .444, 1.124 OPS
LVP: Aramis Ramirez .063, .500 OPS
Reason For Hope: Sometimes the stripper goes home with someone.
#10 Washington Nationals 2-2-1 The Nats are one of the teams on the outside looking in that has a good job of earning an invitation to the big party. The team got a big win V the Braves based on a stellar offensive week and the fact that your opponent pitched like hot garbage.
MVP: Buster Posey 2 HR, 16 TB, .409, 1.207 OPS
LVP: Ian Desmond .190, .499 OPS
Reason For Hope: I think the Nationals owner also knows how to use twitter. If he does things could get very interesting in that division.
#11 Seattle Mariners, 2-3 Uber Ass Bag Kanye West has compared himself.to among others Beethoven, Steve Jobs, Picasso and Jesus. That is similarly offensive to when Daniel screamed that he was under ranked at 5 just a few weeks ago.
What’s next sir? You going to go pick a fight with Taylor Swift as well. Be care young man………..You might not be able to take another loss like that after getting pounded by a rebuilding Brewers and the front running Dodgers wiping his feet all over your ass.
Free Tip: Your strategy of trading assets for 400 year old pitchers just has to work. Don Drysdale and Teddy Higuera are rumored to be OTB. Go for it my man!
MVP: Mike Zunino 1 HR, .400, 1.071 OPS
LVP: Robbie Ross 16.20 Era, 3.60 Whip
Reason For Hope: The AARP has taken notice of your support of old people and are seriously considering investing in your organization.
#12 Detroit Tigers, 2-3 Do not look now but the Tigers are on a two game heater!
Despite being heckled for being a woman the Tigers owner held strong and treated the Cardinals like a bitch. I had predicted better things for this club. Couple this with my obvious inflection that Kanye is a douche and that kind of proves that I am right once in a while.
It is important to note that the victory over the Cards is not as simple as them not showing up. The Tigers dominated all over the board.
MVP: The Pitching Staff. 7 Players picked up wins.
LVP: No one was monumentally bad…….Big Papi .200, .686 OPS
Reason For Hope: The Tigers can jump right into the race for the division title with a week 6 win V the Reds.
#13 Pittsburgh Pirates, 1-3-1 The Pirates beat a strong TB Rays squad to keep themselves out of the discussion for the Cellar. The dueling Adams Saga is now knotted up at 1-1.
I really think heading into their next matchup these two need to go at it a bit on facebook. Adam on Adam crime could only be terribly entertaining. (albeit confusing for sure)
MVP: Desmond Jennings 3 HR, 2 SB, .348, 1.226 OPS
LVP: Travis d’Arnaud .133, .521
Reason For Hope: This Adam is now tied for league's best Adam (based on head to head)
#14 Arizona Diamondbacks, 1-4. I am not against kicking a guy when he is down so this is not about that. I do however want to take a moment and acknowledge that Mr. Stanco is recovering from a stroke and with that wish everyone in the league has an excellent thought or two about him and his recovery. We will be here when you are ready to actively join this debauchery of a league again sir. (That is unless i get fired)
MVP: Paul Goldschmidt 2HR, 19TB, .440, 1.241 OPS
LVP: James Shields 9.95 Era, 2.05 Whip
#15 Chicago Cubs, 1-4. The Cubs should adopt a team motto of “Thank Goodness For The Twins.” I may have mentioned this earlier but it certainly bears repeating. The Cubs might be the team playing this thing better than anyone. The league is designed to be just like real MLB and sometimes if you look at the Cubs and squint just a little this team looks just like the real life Cubs.
MVP: Jon Lestor 8 IP, 15K, 0.00 ERA, 1W, 1QS, .38 Whip
LVP: Cole HAmels 11.57 Era, 2.79 Whip
Reason For Hope: The New 24 is back. TV Can be Fun!
#16 Minnesota Twins: 0-4-1 What can we say about the Twins. Let’s give him credit for showing up every week. Sooner or later a beaten donkey always gives up.
I do not see that happening with this particular donkey.
MVP: Brian Dozier 1HR, 5SB, .360, .928 OPS
LVP: Andrelton Simmons .125, .472 OPS
Reason For Hope: They do Play the CUBS………...we should all be getting the popcorn ready for that mockumentary!